Ford Sends Me a Letter… to Nowhere

So, picture this: I come home one day and there’s a FedEx envelope waiting for me. Overnighted. Signature required. Priority. The kind of envelope that says, “Hey, this is important. Open it now.”

It’s from Ford.

I’m thinking, finally. After months of dealing with a Mustang that spends more time in a service bay than on asphalt, after being ignored by every person in a suit with a Ford logo on their email signature, they’re finally doing the right thing.

I open it. It’s a letter. A very official-looking, totally serious, “we mean business” letter. It says Ford is prepared to buy my car back under the lemon law.

I almost laughed. Finally, I thought, they’re acknowledging what everyone else already knows — this car is toast.

Then I get to the second paragraph.

They’re asking me to send them “copies of all repair orders, diagnostic reports, and service documentation related to the vehicle.”

You know. The same repair orders, diagnostic reports, and service documentation they created.

They wanted me to send them their own paperwork. It’s like your dentist asking you to mail them your teeth.

Still, fine. Whatever. I’m reasonable. I can scan. I can email. I can play along. Except…

There was no email.
No fax number.
No mailing address.
No phone number.

Nothing.

Not even a “reply to this letter.” Just a corporate demand launched into the void.

They literally overnighted me a letter asking for an immediate response… with no way to respond.

I triple-checked the envelope, thinking maybe something fell out. Nope. Empty except for the letter. No return label, no card, nothing.

Ford had basically written:
“Please send us your documents right away!”
—with no instructions on how to do that.

They spent forty bucks to make sure I got the letter as fast as possible, only for it to be completely useless. I couldn’t even contact the sender to say, “Hey, you forgot your contact info.”

Imagine a fire department mailing you a letter that says, “Your house is burning down, please call us immediately,” and then not listing a phone number.

That’s where we’re at.

And the best part? They demanded copies of documents that literally came from their own database. I’m not kidding. Every single thing they asked for was generated by Ford’s own service departments, printed by Ford, handed to me by Ford employees, and apparently deleted from Ford’s collective memory the moment I drove off the lot.

It’s peak Ford: demand paperwork, lose paperwork, then act shocked when you can’t find paperwork.

So here I am, holding a FedEx envelope that cost more to send than the letter inside was worth, from a company that can build a car with 480 horsepower but can’t include a phone number on a form.

And that, my friends, was the moment I realized: Ford doesn’t just make lemons — they make lemon-flavored bureaucracy.

Apparently, I’m not the only one who has issues with Ford. Consumer Affairs, known to be impartial, has a great number of reviews posted. And, surprise, surprise, there are complaints about my exact issue on the Car Complaints website.